Christian Counseling in Spokane, Washington
Counseling for Individuals, Couples and Families

How to Deal with Angry Patients and Friends

I. Do not repress anger. {"Be angry."}

"Be angry, but do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil."

Ephesians 4:26

You do not have to defend God, the practice, your coworkers or yourself…

Examples of repression:

Avoiding people

(Isolation)

The Silent Treatment

(Pouting)

Reneging on Promises

(Passive Aggressive)

Sarcasm & Wise Cracks

(Abuse)

Self-Pity

(Depression)

II. Express anger righteously. {"Do not sin."}

A. Jesus was angry with Simon Peter, money-changers, etc.

B. Examples of expression:

1. Determination to make changes

2. Endurance

3. Forbearance

4. Righteous fights against illness and immorality

III. Settle anger quickly {"Do not let the sun go down on your anger."}

A.	Go to the one angry with you as soon as you know; sandwich your conversation with them between conversations with God: Pray/Go/Pray.
B.	Examples of working out:
	V.	Validate their right to get angry by encouraging expression. Don't be afraid of emotions; label and accept feelings.
	I.	Investigate their anger as a cue to hurtful experiences. What is making them angry? Why does that make them angry?
	E.	Express their anger productively by setting limits and using self-disclosure give reasons for setting limits].
	W.	Work out their anger creatively by using problem solving skills in terms of options, results and responsibility.

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